Last week I shared how I've been travelling with life now that I'm working full-time.
It felt really good to be honest about the challenges and that I'm enjoying the change too.
I've got to admit though - there was a time that I would have been ashamed to confess publicly that I was working full-time. My ideals have certainly evolved but for a long time I wanted to be a stay-at-home-mum and always be available for my kids. I thought I'd be neglecting them and I wouldn't be able to meet their needs if I was working full-time.
This is very much not the case and I've been so proud of how easily the kids have adjusted to me being around less.
I've always been told that kids are very adaptable and resilient and I can see that this is true for my children. Both Miss E and J-Man have taken the changes to home life in their stride and are very proud of their Mum.
I have to add though, that despite moving in a positive direction and loving this new life of mine, I haven't felt as resilient of my kids have.
There have been some really tough times.
I think if I hated my job or had lost my passion for a career than I would have thrown in the towel.
There have been several nights where I have sobbed to my husband out of complete physical and mental exhaustion. My favourite phrase in these moments is, "It's just too hard. It all just feels too hard."
But as is typical with me, a good teary and vent with my man makes me feel much better. It doesn't make the challenges any easier but the cry and the chat makes me feel like someone understands.
The first two weeks in my new role rendered me completely and utterly exhausted. I would get home and fall onto the lounge where I would stay until dinner was served. I'd then tuck the kids into bed after they were showered and crawl into bed myself. Sleep was priority and the only way I could survive.
I started to worry that this wasn't sustainable and that constant fatigue was going to become unbearable. But it was my sister-in-law who reassured me. She reminded me of what it was like when we would go back to school after the school holidays when we were kids. And I knew what she meant. In those school days I would feel so tired during the first week back after the holidays as I adjusted to the faster pace and the relentless routine of the school term. Being reminded of this made me realise that the exhaustion soon passed back in those school days and I quickly adjusting to school life again.
It just took a little bit of time to adjust.
This comparison really helped to reassure me with adjusting to full-time work. And it was so true. Within a couple of weeks of running the full-time work treadmill I felt on top of things and work and family life felt manageable (not perfect, but manageable) again.
It's all still busy, and there's still days that test me. I've just learnt to roll with them, knowing that a new day and a fresh start will come with the sunrise.
I'm much more realistic about expecting how much I can achieve and I've lowered my expectations around the state of the house. For the most part I don't sweat the small stuff.
My biggest challenge at the moment is enjoying my weekends. Working and travelling all week means that my weekends are jam-packed with washing, cleaning, housework, groceries, food prep, family admin, and the list goes on.
The result is me having a very short fuse and a low tolerance to pretty much anything and anyone. This makes me a cranky mummy (and wife!) because I'm so damned SPENT!
It's a juggle, and I'm not going to pretend that I've got it all together. But it's certainly all a lot more do-able than I ever imagined. A supportive family, and school-aged kids probably has a lot to do with it.
Above all, a positive attitude, ambition and stable mental health is essential.